I just got a statement in the mail today from my insurance company, saying that because my OBGYN chose to send my coochie juice to a laboratory that no longer takes my insurance -- way back in June, mind your -- I'm going to owe Quest Diagnostics $400.
$400!!!!
If I have to pay some bitch $400 to sample my coochie juice, I better get, like, at least 3 screaming orgasms out of the whole ordeal.
I'm just pissed that it's too late for any of these fools to pick up the phone -- and that I can't decide who exactly needs the killin'. My insurance company for thinking my OBGYN's decisions (which were never announced to me, BTW) are my fucking problem? My OBGYN's office for sending my goods to them? (Like they didn't know? What, are they giving each other free tongue baths for all of this too?) Or Quest Fucking Diagnostics?
Well, I've had unpleasant experiences with them before, so, you know what? I'm actually not mad that bitch-slapping hours don't start until 9:00 tomorrow, because you know what that gave me time to do? Google "Quest Diagnostics Class Action." And big surprise! There's a ton on the internet about that. I'm not clear on the details, but it does have to do with shady billing. So now I have the toll-free number of the firm that's been handling it. I also have the State Attorney General's number. Fuck the OBGYN, my insurance company, AND Quest Diagnostics. I'm starting with the people who know about suing.
How do you like my tasty cum juice now, bitch? Now how much would you pay?
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